Well . . . I was all set to write a good-news blog about finishing my chemotherapy treatments this past Wednesday.
This is not that blog.
Yes … I’m finished with that round of chemo, but I learned on Wednesday that my “cancer has progressed” during the course of the chemo. The CT scan I had about 10 days ago showed evidence of enlarged lymph nodes.
This is not good news. It’s not supposed to happen like this.
Next step: A new, different chemo regimen that they use when the platinum-based chemo drugs have been ineffective. This one will be administered every four weeks (instead of weekly), so that’s a good thing. The doctor said my hair should start growing back (along with eyebrows and eyelashes – which has been a big bummer in recent weeks – and will one day be the subject of a funny blog about trying to apply false eyelashes for the first time in my life!). So that’s another good thing.
Side effects from this new drug are not severe – though I suffered so minimally this last round, that I have no expectation of being bothered by negative side effects.
I asked the Doctor about resuming traveling and he said, “Go for it.” No concerns about airports, crowds or airplanes. So THAT’s very welcome news!
I’d be lying to say I’m not disappointed and discouraged by this setback. I fully expected the chemo to do its magic and I’d be celebrating and dancing a jig right about now. But I also knew, in the back of my mind, that since I carry the BRCA1 gene, that I have a higher-than-average risk for cancer recurrence because of my genetic makeup. I just never expected to have to face a recurrence this soon!
But I have an excellent medical team at Kaiser and unbelievable support, care and love from hundreds of friends, customers and colleagues – to the point that it is sometimes overwhelming to consider all the people who are holding me in thought and prayer.
I’ll be more proactive in Round 2 – embarking on a regular exercise regimen and modifying my diet – which I did not do last time. I’m doing yoga in the morning, too – which is something I’ve vowed to begin to practice every year, and have never followed through. No excuses this time.
There’s a whole lot of things I have yet to do with my life, so I’ve no intention of letting this disease get the better of me!
Thank you from the bottom of my heart for your love and support – and, please, keep it coming!!
Namaste,
Marilyn
Gail
January 6, 2017Marilyn,
You continue to inspire with grace and humor. A combination that can’t be beat. I am also a cancer survivor of Non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma now going on fourteen years. They say there is no cure for this type of blood cancer, but I believe the drugs today have given hope that never was possible until now. I have just finished an immunotherapy round (based on finding enlarged lymph nodes) and that seems to have arrested the situation. You are definitely in a good space with your treatment going forward.
I, too, do yoga and meditation daily, deep breathing and disconnecting either temporarily or permanently from toxic vampires, whether they be family, friends, or clients, and focus on just using my time to refine my life simply. I don’t need to prove anything by watching dumb television shows, waste time texting or constantly checking Facebook. I refuse to listen to dire forecasts about our country as we are supposed to be nearing the end of democracy. With cancer, I only believe we all learn and survive better than before. All is about what a nurse psychiatrist said–invaluable simplicity–“learn to PARTNER with the situation and then manage the results as best you can.” That gives you a position of strength on par with the challenge, and does not make you the victim of any situation.
You have an overwhelming number of supporters because you are an extraordinary woman. It shows with your grace under pressure that is the “go-to” and non-whining approach. You are already there, so prayers and good wishes go with this note on your next round. Thank you for your inspirational blog. It helps so many of us in all ways, from health to giving meaning to our lives as we redisccover what is really important, and the reason for being here in the first place.
Namaste,
Gail
Donna
January 6, 2017Marilyn,
You are an amazing woman and your positivity about this new news is admirable. Keeping your eyes and thoughts upwards is such a gift to yourself and all who know you. Brian and I are continuing to pray for your health and we ask our Lord to shower you with his strength, peace and healing.
BIG loves to you friend,
Donna & Brian
Lynn B
January 6, 2017Gaaaagh – difficult news Marilyn! Sending hugs.
Karen
January 7, 2017Sending positive thoughts your way – you will beat this Marilyn!
Helene Volkman
January 7, 2017Dear Marilyn,
Needless to say I am disappointed to hear this latest turn of events in your battle with this cancer, but I will continue to believe you will beat it in the end. Keep staying positive and let me know if I can help you in any way.
Helene
Hilda Haigazian
January 9, 2017Marilyn you truly are an amazing lady, I am so sorry about the news you got but remember the is only a small bump in the road you are going to conquer this battle. Can’t wait to be traveling with you in 2017
Keep staying positive thinking and praying for you. Love you lots 😘😘
Felice
January 10, 2017Damn, I guess you have an even bigger battle ahead of you. We’ll all just have to be bigger and stronger because we’re in this together. Keep showing us how to do it, because we all need guidance to get through our own fears, pitfalls and obstacles – all bound to come at some point. Loving you.